Halloween is coming and I dread it.
My daughter has a rare disorder that causes her to be on a medical ketogenic diet. She’s a keto kid. Many kids are on this diet who have epilepsy that is unresponsive to medication. Everything is weighed out on a scale and fat is her brain food. She can’t have a lot of carbohydrates, therefore, she can’t have the candy that every other child is gorging themselves on. Just a couple bites not weighed can cause many issues, including seizures. She’s been on this diet for 3 1/2 years and trying to explain it can sometimes be a pain. Plus, it embarrasses her to have a lot of people know. (She’s going to love that I wrote about it.) And, as if that isn’t enough, she also has a peanut allergy. She is anaphylactic, meaning she could die from it. Even if she’s around it, she breaks out in hives. It’s terrible and something I never want to go through with her again. For those of you who have been there, you get it. You absolutely get it.
She is very frightened of having a reaction because she’s had one three times that required emergency care. She won’t even go into a room if she knows there’s been peanut butter. The times she had a reaction were very scary and she remembers every time. She loves dressing up and thinking of a costume for Halloween. She loves the idea of Halloween. But Halloween is definitely frightening – for us and for her.
I want her to have an ordinary life though. One that doesn’t separate her from other kids. She already feels different enough. She can’t often eat treats at birthday parties. She can’t have “just a bite”. So many things she can’t do. But, we try to focus on what she CAN do. She can get dressed up and go trick-or-treating. She can have fun with her friends and brother. She can and we will.
Two things we WILL do as parents:
1. We will ask at the door if they have anything without peanuts or a non-food item.
2. We will offer her the option of turning all of her candy in and picking out something special from the store.
She’s a trooper and has never complained. Never. Which is amazing in itself.
I know there are many other children out there who can’t have a normal Halloween either. I understand how difficult it is to fight for your child to be “normal”. I understand how consuming it is. I understand how tiring it gets having to explain it to everybody. Keep communicating, keep advocating, and keep empowering your kids. That is the only way that change will happen.
For those of you reading this who want to help make it easier on families who have to navigate through your neighborhood and who may have a child like mine, here are a few suggestions:
1. Offer non-food items like bubbles, bracelets, stickers, glow sticks, pencils, bouncy balls, and press on tattoos.
2. Have a peanut-free candy option or don’t offer anything with peanuts. Smarties, Dum-Dums, Tootsie Roll – these are all peanut free.
3. For more ideas, search for The Teal Pumpkin Project. This is a project that helps you think of nonfood items for Halloween. This helps kids who have diabetes, allergies, keto kids, and even children whose parents don’t want them to have a bunch of candy.
I hope you consider making Halloween safe for everyone and, to those parents of children like mine, you’ve got this. You CAN do this. You ARE doing this. Know you’re not alone.
