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Rochester Local

Help Wanted: Why Every Mom Needs a Mentor

During my first pregnancy, I wished for a buddy. I imagined the two of us having the same due date, plunging into motherhood together. And my dream was soon fulfilled. A college friend was only 4 weeks behind me. She lived out of state, so we swapped stories via email and managed a phone call or two along the way.

We commiserated about our angry bouts of heartburn. She, too, could no longer see her own feet! Our bodies were on parallel journeys, making her the perfect sounding board.

Soon after my daughter was born, I realized my pregnancy peer was no longer my go-to gal; I needed the moms who were a few years ahead of me. The big kids. Don’t get me wrong. There is value in pushing strollers side by side while your newborns sleep or scream. Hanging with a mom at the park while your toddlers throw sand (or eat it) makes the day a little brighter. These women are essentials in our mom toolboxes.

But on those especially tough days, you require a professional in your back pocket.

You want the mom who has been there. You need a Mommy Mentor. A trusted woman to be honest with you. A mom who can tell you how she resolved the problem that you are struggling with now. Not someone to scare the heck out of you and wonder if motherhood was such a good idea. Just a woman who knows what the hard stuff is and has survived.

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As I struggled with a sleepless baby – the one who NEVER slept – I turned to my Mommy Mentor. I got nightly counseling from her. A sleep strategy AND the reassurance that I was not alone. Not only did she create a plan for my non-sleeping angel, she also talked me off the ledge. Because she had been there two years earlier and had come out on the other side.

When we went to summer camp, who guided us? The counselors: the ones who had once been campers themselves. Life in the college dorm? There were RAs who knew what it was like to be a college freshman. They could steer us in the right direction.

Motherhood? That’s where the Mommy Mentor comes in. Sleep schedule? Navigating preschool? First day of kindergarten? Transition to middle school? Puberty? Empty Nest? There’s a mom out there who has survived every stage; she’s there to help you.

So when you’re done rocking babies and changing diapers, put in an application and mentor a newbie. She needs you!

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