Politics. Religion. Body Image. Bullying. Social Media. Video Games.
We live in a world where we are continuously bombarded with the “right” news, practicing the “right” religion (or lack thereof), having the “right” body. We read articles and instantly believe they are true. We see a meme on Facebook and begin sharing it before actually fact-checking it. We see political ads bashing a candidate, and that becomes our platform for disagreement with the candidate.
Has it always been this way? Have we always relied on others for our sources of information and self-worth instead of doing the work ourselves?
I don’t know the answer to those questions, but I do know one thing: I can teach my children to think for themselves. Here are a few things I do to help my children learn how to think for themselves.
Have Open Discussions
This fall, my son came home from school saying that a certain political candidate was a terrible horrible man, and I should not vote for him. He was so insistent, he was brought to tears when I told him he didn’t have the right to tell me who to vote for. I asked him where he was getting his information, and he said a boy at the bus stop told him he saw it on tv.
Political Ads.
This past year was full of them just like every year before it. Groups pay to bash candidates. We had a great discussion about this right then and there. We looked up information on this politician and his opponents. We talked about the good things and the bad things about each candidate. We talked about issues that are important to our family and friends. THEN I asked him who HE would vote for in the election now that he was fully informed.
Continuously Play “Devil’s Advocate”
I learned a very important lesson during my senior year of high school. This was the 2004 Presidential Election year. Tensions were high between parties. I chose my presidential candidate solely on what I heard at home. My world geography teacher opened my eyes. He began questioning me and debating with me, but he did so in an educational way. If a student who believed the opposite of me posed his/her opinions, he also questioned and debated them.
At the time, I was slightly annoyed. I believed what I believed. Leave me alone. BUT, I began to realize why he was doing this. He wanted me to think for myself. He did not care one bit who I voted for as long as I was informed, educated and convicted in my beliefs. I still voted for my original candidate of choice, but I did so with more conviction. (Thank you, Mr. Manley!)
My kids are young, but I can still do this with them. When my almost 6-year-old tells me he hates something, (BTW, hate is a bad word in our house. We don’t allow it) I question him and get him to truly understand what he’s saying. When he comes home with more ideas he learned on the bus or the playground, I challenge him on those thoughts. I make him think about it from every angle.
Teach Kindness.
Every time I go on social media or attend an event, I hear and see people being outright mean and hurtful to one another. It could be because of their religion, ethnicity, socioeconomic status, political beliefs, education, occupation….you name it. Let’s not even get started on what kind of mom-shaming occurs in public and on the internet…
This is not the type of world I want my children to grow up in. I want them to find the unique qualities of other humans beautiful. I want them to appreciate differences in opinions and learn how to debate appropriately. I want them to love and serve others.
These qualities begin at home. We model this behavior in our own lives so our children can see this played out. We also actively talk about what it means to be kind. Every morning as I hug my kindergartner goodbye, I tell him to be kind to everyone, no matter what!
At the end of the day, I cannot control social media, the news or other people, but I can control my words and actions. I can control actively teaching my children the skills they need to think for themselves.
